On The Importance Of Regular Intimacy For Mental Health And Overall Wellbeing

“I learned though that my sexual desires are very mental.”

A male acquaintance said that in response to a query of his general desires. Which got me thinking again:

Through the decades of escorting, I’ve run into countless men who suppress their biological need to ejaculate. They tend to focus on one thing — anal training/play, for example — and it turns into an obsession. Then a compulsion. At that point, they’re wired like an addict, with all the accompanying difficulties functioning in “normal”, non-addict life.

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Foot Fetishists: Why I Attend Sex Clubs Fully Nude Except For Ankle-High Boots/Heels

This was originally posted on a social media site for kinksters as a response to a man looking for women into foot fetish to attend or meet at a sex club:

Foot fetishists? It’s the reason I wear at least ankle-high heels/boots — I enjoy being touched, caressed, no fingers insertions of course but “groped” all over, so I tend to take my dress off and go full nude with just boots/large sunglasses once inside. Sometimes I  bring massage oil to be all slippery for guys that just want to feel oiled breasts or rub against me to ejaculate on my body — between butt cheeks, boobs, then face seem to be the most popular for that. Super fun. Low risk too — don’t get it in your eyes, hence the glasses.

Continue reading “Foot Fetishists: Why I Attend Sex Clubs Fully Nude Except For Ankle-High Boots/Heels”

Inter-personal Meetings In a Time of Covid

November 17th, 2020

This began as a tweet after I had declined to see a business traveler who flew in from a state that has been hit hard with a high per-capita rate of Covid-19. I was less concerned about travelling than his attitude of “it’s fake news, no one is really dying from Chinese virus”.

I ignored the racism — I personally don’t enjoy spending time with people who can’t control vocalizing their opinions at strangers. Hence the blurb on my screening page: “I only see clients I believe are going to leave me feeling emotionally, mentally and physically better than I did before I saw them.”

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How To Use USD-Tether to Hedge Cryptocurrency Volatility

Sep 5th, 2020: Cryptocurrency is wildly volatile and this makes a lot of people hesitant to accept it as a payment form. A lot can be done to temper that volatility — you don’t have to sit idly by while bitcoin vacillates between sub-$5,400 to over $12,400, as it has these past six months. 


Skip down to the next heading if you already own and understand how to send/receive bitcoin.

All of these topics will be covered later with pictographic tutorials so you can visually follow through. For now and in brief: If you do not yet have any bitcoin, start with an easy way to never lose them and generate a 12-word “mnemonic” recovery phrase. This saves you from having to write down and store a single, long bitcoin private key — they’re easy to lose or confuse, doing either means you’re locked out of your wallet. Note: the phrase you generate on that page is done in your browser, so neither I nor anyone can intercept it. Meaning: it’s a safe way to start.

So when you first set up a wallet such as exodus.io or any modern wallet, choose to “restore from backup phrase”  and enter the 12-word phrase you generated. Keep that phrase, never share or lose it, and you can always “restore”  your wallet if you lose your phone, laptop or computer.

That done, you’ll want to purchase bitcoin, which we’ll go over in another post, but can be done via many services, a few being: coinbase.com, kraken.com or CashApp. You can also purchase cryptocurrencies from people like me that mine them directly. More on that, too, later.

After you purchase bitcoin — and there’s usually a frustrating, couple-week waiting period — transfer your coins into your Exodus wallet. In Exodus, choose “bitcoin” from the home screen, click on “receive” and send from your exchange to your private wallet. Always send all new incoming bitcoin to your Exodus wallet — it generates a new address for every transaction, meaning the world can’t see the totality of your holdings. It’s a privacy thing. You don’t let your bank account balance hang out there for all to see, do you? This is why you want to use a wallet that generates a new address every time you use it.

Now that you have your bitcoin, open an account on okex.com and be sure to set up “2fa” or two-factor authentication. It’s easy with Google’s Authenticator app — don’t ever skimp on security with exchanges! Use all available tools. I’ve managed to lose substantial value in coins via exchange hacks over the years — google “Mt.gox, BTC-C and/or Cryptopia” exchanges. If those stories make you fearful of leaving all your assets on an exhange: good, you should be.


Once all that is done, the hard part is over. In OKex.com see the next three pictures:

  1. Select the upper right “Assets” drop-down and choose “Deposit”.
  2. Select bitcoin, click “continue”.
  3. Copy your address — or use the QR code with a BitPay-style wallet with scanner — and send from your wallet into okex.com.

Use the default settings for the fees — don’t try and save a buck or two or your transaction can get “stuck” for days before it barfs back to your wallet.

The rest is easy. Transfer the money into your “spot” account on okex.com, from the top menu bar under “Trade” choose the “Spot” market. On the left you’ll see the first-most column starts with “USDT USD$ CRYPTO”, choose the USDT. This stands for “US Dollar, Tether” which is a, you guessed it, peg in value to $1 US dollar. Meaning, if bitcoin is $10,000 dollars, and you exchange 1.0 bitcoin  for USDT, you’ll get 10,000 of the latter. If bitcoin drops to $5,000, you can use your 10,000 USDT to buy back 2.0 bitcoin.

Here’s where the magic comes in: You can do a conditional stop-loss/take-profit order. With this type of order, you can automatically sell if bitcoin goes up to a certain amount you’re hoping for, but also automatically sell if it drops to a low value you’re dreading. Execution of either order will cancel the opposing one.

Expand the picture below and you’ll see I’ve chosen, in red, to “Sell BTC”, the TP Trigger is the “take profit trigger” or price I’m hoping it’ll hit soon, which I set to $12,000. I set the “”TP Order Price” at “market” and not fixed at 12,100 in case it’s skyrocketing quickly and goes up more before the order executes — it’ll take the highest available market price to sell.

Below that I’ve set the “SL Trigger Price” of the price I’m dreading it doesn’t drop below (indicating a huge crash)  to $9,400 and again set the “SL Order Price” to market. Cryptocurrencies can crash very, very quickly if someone is selling a lot of them in bulk. Setting the stop-loss price and sell “order” price at $9,400 means it can drop far below the sell price before the order is able to execute. Thus, I set the sell price to “market”.

After that, click the bright red “Sell BTC” button and the order will queue up and wait for either price to trigger.

As long as OK Exchange isn’t hacked, it’s a set-and-forget way to keep from loosing your shirt while also automatically taking some nice profits if there’s a spike.

Of course in my crazy life, the huge amount of money I lost in the cryptopia.com hack turned out to be one of the best events of my life. I met “Nikki Jonesing” that evening…

Take-profit and stop-loss conditional order example on OKex.com

An Introduction To Denver’s Swinging Culture and The Sex Club Lifestyle

A question in Reddit‘s subgroup r/ColoradoSwingers group was recently posted by couple:[M21/F23] Anyone have any opinions of Mon Chalet? Thinking about me and my girl going soon any thoughts! In Reddit-speak, this means “A couple, the male age 21 and female age 23” are asking for opinions on Denver’s sex club, Mon Chalet. The comments, as they tend to do on Reddit, diverged and became about Denver sex clubs in general. To which I responded with a general comment on the Denver “lifestyle” scene, and I’ve expanded it a bit here:

There’s also Denver Sanctuary, if you want to explore rope/leather/BDSM. Oddly, these types of events — which have clearly defined rules for newbies — can be less intimidating.

Mon Chalet is very 1970s sex-club-like. They’ve stopped allowing single men in without a room during the daytime too, cutting down on the “dude ranch” thing. Which is sad for me as I’m into MMMMF. So that’s a bummer, but good for couples/single women. Still, single men are are often aggressive , their rudeness is the “knock” on Mon Chalet — I’ve actually had, without asking permission, a guy try a finger up my backside in the pool, been groped from behind in the hot tub, all sorts of out-of-bounds behavior. It’s infrequent and spread over years so not the norm but it happens there. Less so now that single men aren’t allowed in with pool passes only.

Regardless, it is a great place to pre-arrange to meet a couple there and have a room to retreat to. If you leave your door ajar, it’s a signal you’re open to talking to other people with rooms. Heck, if it’s nice out, sit on your doorstep and talk to passers-by who also have rooms. This tends to be a nice way to meet couples. I’m heard from friends that single women do go (and I’ve gone by myself before, see below) but I’ve never actually seen it, so don’t expect it — the women you meet here will generally be with a male partner, and he’ll have to share, thus, you’ll have to share. The pool and hot tubs are meticulously clean, fun to swim/soak in nude, and Saturday nights are really hopping. It tends to be fairly well occupied during the week, predominately with single males renting rooms but also fun couples.

Scarlet Ranch is a really, really nice place. Sadly, as of four or five years ago, no more hot tub which is something I personally have always enjoyed at clubs. There are shower and towels downstairs to stay fresh. The showers are somewhat hard to find if you’re unfamiliar, ask the downstairs towel attendant for directions. It’s much more laid back and reserved than large “sex clubs” you read about in NYC/LA/SF. It’s more or a “I’m here to F my husband while other couples F themselves and we watch each other” exhibitionist-style club than an all-out-sex club. Some summer weekend nights it can get somewhat “hot and heavy”, as the outdoor cabanas ($100/night) are a immensely fun and a great way to meet people. The downstairs is always naughty but also tends to be pretty clique-heavy Vs. sex clubs in other major coastal cities. Worth the money if you have it to spare.

As with all clubs, if you’re a “unicorn” or “full-swap” wife, then it’s always pretty much “on”. Anywhere, anytime. Unlike most cities’ clubs, Mon Chalet and Scarlet Ranch charge single females — they’re usually free — so there’s almost never any at Mon (they always charge single women), and only occasionally at Scarlet. IMHO, Scarlet Ranch would be an overall more fun and more greatly attended by single men/couples if they let single women in without the fee. Which I believe they still do on Thursday’s “Ladies Night”, which was still dead — Scarlet Ranch is pretty vacant on weekdays. Sometimes even Friday nights aren’t highly attended. So if you want a low-key visit so see the premises, go on a Thursday and look around. If you want to dive right in, pick a Saturday in the summer.

Alternatively, what’s really nice in Denver is the gatherings of swinger couples for house parties. Hang around Scarlet Ranch as an open/swap couple, be patient and polite and you’ll eventually get invited.

Or search out groups that come and go like this one:


I think for married couples, house parties of like-minded couples are always the best. They tend to be hosted by really, really cool people in upscale homes. There’s snacks, drinks, other like-minded, low-pressure people. These tend in age towards the early-30s to mid-40s, professional “let’s have as much fun on the weekend as we can, I’ve got a stressful job (and probably kids) during the week” crowd.

One thing: The Denver swing crowd is solidly pro-bi-women, but not bi-male oriented. I’ve never seen M/M at the pool at Mon or downstairs in Scarlet. Granted, I’m on the full-swap “let’s F!” side of things and not super attentive to what others are doing in the moment. It is what it is. If you’re into gay/bi male, there’s the MadeUpClub. They have a fetlife group.

I’ve never personally been to MadeUpClub. Keep meaning to… …I do have clients I trust that have gone and said it was well-run, safe and fun.

All in all, for both men and women, the choice to actually go the first time is, by far, the scariest part. Swingers tend to be nice, chill, accepting people. Discrimination and those into misogyny/negativity just aren’t tolerated, nor is any kind of rudeness about others’ looks/body types.

AS FOR THE SINGLE MALES: Things are much harder than couples, and vastly more difficult than they are for single women. Expect to pay your dues . Both monetarily and time-wise. You’ll have to absorb the high cost of a room at Mon Chalet every time you go and the yearly membership fee at Scarlet Ranch, which is hefty for single men. Then you have to be there, be non-pushy — actually getting what you want at clubs means the behaving like a gentleman, never being aggressive about wanting your member attended to. You’ll get absolutely nowhere walking up to a couple and asking to kiss the wife, talking about your phallus, vocalizing how great you are in bed. Be mellow: chivalry counts.

So for you single guys: If you want to try and score a “hotwife” to have sex with in a semi-public place, Mon Chalet is the better choice. If you have the resources in time and money and want to get into the swinging lifestyle, Scarlet Ranch is the place to be. Go every weekend. Take an Uber, bring a bottle of whatever to leave behind the bar. Mingle, socialize, revel in the sexual freedom and wait for an invite. Then you’ll get invites outside of the club.

As an aside: Clubs aren’t openly sex-worker friendly but very “don’t ask, don’t tell” accepting. Yeah, the 70-year-old guy with a hot 20-something at a club is probably an arrangement, but have the self control to keep your opinion to yourself. Thus, you can attend with a provider who knows and trusts you. Meaning: the woman will need to trust you’ll keep nature of your relationship private. Boastful braggarts are a boor, don’t be “that” guy.

IF YOU’VE GOTTEN THIS FAR, A SEXY/TRUE STORY: As a single female, after an epically bad day, I went to Mon Chalet as a single female and met my current partner, another single female. So it does happen; although I see the irony that a woman took one of the few other available women “off the market” for single guys, we do still occasionally go to meet other couples or guys… 🙂

AT THE END OF THE DAY IT’S HARD TO GUESS WHAT TYPE OF CLUB YOU’LL ENJOY. My partner is curvy, feminine, outwardly demure and polite. But she’s a soft-spoken “domme” and really enjoys Mon Chalet. Me? I appear to men to be 5’10” of weight-lifting, arse-kicking domme into group sex, but inter-personally with my wife I’m really a never-wear-pants (as in dresses/skirts), “1950s household” kinda gal that really likes the low-key “let’s have a nice topless meal and drink” vibe of Scarlet Ranch. You just can’t tell by reading about it, you have to go try and let your own personal swinging style evolve…


A lovely couple posted a reply on Reddit: “Chatted with so many couples who think they will go for ladies night and are guaranteed a threesome. It is a bummer. But they wouldn’t be called unicorns of they were everywhere

Well said, and sadly, I agree. As an elusive “unicorn” myself, from my side it’s a bummer getting the hard press right off the bat from couples. I’m super slutty but it’s just a huge turn-off being asked for sex straight away. The assumption I’ll just sleep with one or both… ..not even an inquiry into what I’d like, who I am or why I’m even at the club that night (I could just want to have a naked drink and chat).

Another unsaid thing, as noted in your profile: “Couples (not looking for full swap) and single women only – No Single Men” As with all things sex, the availability of men will always outstrip women — even when couples are involved. So the male part of couples should never assume another couple will “full swap” or a single woman is interested. It should be an unspoken rule that the woman of the couple speaks to other women first! 🙂

Below, you can click “create your own review” to leave personal feedback/reviews about Mon Chalet; alternatively leave a comment about this story in the box below.

Why I Do Not See Unverified Hobbyists

Seeing unverified men is both an unnecessary danger and risks the privacy of all previous clients. This was discussed in a recent post on a local Colorado bulletin board, where an Denver-based escort was feeling like she was being singled-out because she sees random hobbyists without any verification:

On 7/14/2020 at 5:29 PM, {provider’s name redacted} said:

“I’m not trying to start any drama or make anyone uncomfortable, however, when someone states one thing after I explain the valid reasons why not screening by itself is not a reason to not see a provider, and then goes right back to saying that all girls that do not screen should be cause to worry, as a provider that doesn’t screen I take that personally. And, I have yet to have one provider stand behind their statement and explain to me why they feel it’s ok to say that when it would stop someone from seeing me, personally. I’m not talking about any other providers than myself. If you are going to make that statement then can you please give me any reason why a client should be worried?”

After seeing this thread languish for a while I (probably stupidly) decided to reply honestly:

Like {hobbyist’s name redacted} noted above, I also don’t want to start a troll/drama thread, and to back that up I’ll offer to refer all those who want to meet without any verification at all to you if you’d like? So I don’t think anyone is trying to take business from you. More likely,  they’re worried about you and your safety.

As an additional preface, to the 85% of men that are nice and just looking to hide their identities completely (which is a perfectly rational position), don’t project your general niceness onto the significant percentage of men that don’t share your fun-loving, protective-of-women attitudes. It only takes one a-hole to drive a women from this business. There’s often a singular reason providers you know and like quit…

But the short answer is: You have the potential to give references (even if it’s just an unverified man pointing to reviews of you as his proof that he’s seen providers) and thus letting people — a good percentage of whom have a high probability of being problematic — into a community of trust.

Let’s not forget the P411 infiltration. References were built up, no seeming drama, then arrests were made. It’s a classic LEO cycle.

The reference-only system is thus flawed, and all providers that see hobbyists on this reference-only model without real name verification are at a greater risk of arrest, or worse. Which is more common that you think — right here in Denver, DPD received a one-million grant to fight “sex trafficking” and there were almost immediately two group arrests of women who showed up on references only; one netted 17 providers, the next 26, then I stopped paying attention and won’t do outcalls in Denver County. To be fair to the LEO side, escorting is legal — it’s a civil infraction to do it without a permit which carries a permanent record of prostitution without a license — so they seemingly only prosecuted those with existing warrants or women who had drugs on them.

More pointedly: I was asked to go, the real names didn’t verify, so I didn’t go.

Providers that are arrested potentiality compromise the identities and lives of everyone they’ve ever seen before. I screen, heavily, to protect not only my safety, but the safety of all my regulars and everyone I’ve seen.

Worse, borderline personality disorder (derivatives of which replace classic sociopath/psychopath in the DSM-V) is more prevalent in men than women, and violent tendencies is an almost uniquely male predisposition. I’ve personally declined recidivist, violent felons — why would I want to give my address and invite a man who likes to beat women into my home? Why would you take such a risk? Why would anyone who has a choice not to? There’s a provider who successfully screened out a burgeoning killer. Which is a fabulous story, but hers to tell…

This is about safety and fun in the privacy of our homes — Vs. people with anger issues looking to “get over” on another human. Heaven help them, but streetwalkers are for the unverified, escorts are for the professional hobbyists who can afford the elevated privacy/security Vs. streetwalkers . By seeing people completely unverified you’re blurring that line and, as I said, letting potentially dangerous people “in” to the system designed to protect women.

This prompted the board admin to close the discussion with this post:

 “On 7/19/2020 at 10:44 AM, JessicaJonesing said: I’d thought a hobbyist was compromised and that his account was used for stings on providers?

I’d be remiss if I didn’t answer this with an emphatic —> NO, this was never the case…….

As we can see from this arrest report — where a dozen women were arrested via hobbyists’ accounts taken over on the vaunted “P411” reference site — that response is entirely not true. Escorting websites are compromised all the time, from both the providers’ (escorts) and hobbyists’ (clients) side of the transaction.

I have personal experience with this: Not so long ago I was invited to a Denver “outcall” appointment at a downtown hotel. The requester had an account on the board in mention, but his real name didn’t track, so I declined.

Twenty-three women were arrested that night. Escorting is legal in Colorado (you need a permit, failure to obtain one is civil infraction which shouldn’t be an arrest-level offense) and the charges were stunning: Sex Offender Registration Violation. Friends were caught up in this sting, their lives devastated. They successfully fought and had the charges expunged, but the cost was in the mid-four-figure range to do so.

No police were charged with misconduct (reportedly, they had some weird fetish requests) or false arrest. My insistence of full, real-name/job verification meant I’d avoided this drama.

Here’s the stupid part of why I should’ve just let it be: That board’s predominant business model is promoting their site to hobbyists as a safe place where they can build references to see women without real-name verification. That is, build up enough “reviews” or “references” and the idea is you’re a safe man to see women anonymously. The providers must real-world verify with driver’s licenses while hobbyists register for free, anonymously. Revenues come from the female providers who pay for advertisements to promote themselves to that large base of hobbyists.

So the implication in my post placed on their board is — if taken personally — isn’t safe. Which is true: the reference-only model is flawed, being “relatively safe”. There’s shades of grey in everything, and “TOB” is a smart model, nicely-run and relatively safer-than-most place — especially for the male hobbyists since the women are verified. Meaning the guys have recourse if a women behaves badly.

The flaw in that is any man can get in. Law enforcement can successfully see women like the one above who doesn’t check references, parlay proof of that appointment by leaving a review, and move on to build up a dozen references before arrests begin.

Or worse. Fans of history will remember the “Denver Prostitute Killer” and the arsehole who started the collapse of unified (and much safer for women) online advertising: The Craigslist Killer. The latter of whom an acquaintance of mine reports declining to see since he failed her tough screening before he murdered Julissa Brisman.

Lastly, for the gentleman: Unless you’re using Qubes OS via TOR and/or a VPN paid for by a truly fungible currency like Monero on a self-built desktop or second-hand laptop, don’t believe for a second your online fake-name trail can’t be traced back to your real life. If a provider you’ve seen gets caught up in some trumped-up arrest scam, the seizure of her digital assets will lead back to you. Thus, choose whom you see carefully, and realize that my harsh screening is in place to protect all previous clients.

For what it’s worth, I wrote this on a full-disk-encrytped SE/Linux desktop with single-use encryption password, then published via transport layer security to my own encrypted server (again with single-use encryption key) in the Netherlands. I host my own mail there, where prostitution is legal. I do not offer DORA-licensed massage-based services, rather:

      1. CO Title 12, section 12, paragraph 35.5-110 “legal alternative methods that employ contact structured to deepen a person’s awareness of movement patterns in his or her body.” which you may freely perceive as “FBSM with GFE” Or:
      2. I can be hired as an adult actress. Federal 2257 compliance required, and you’re free to perceive that as “PSE”, but the intent to film for distribution (and I’d be grateful if you’d allow me to post it to my pornhub page!) makes whatever your deviant mind can dream up legal.

Regardless of your perceptions, both are explicitly legal. Thus I welcome all clients who are in a place in their life to meet under their real name and are specifically looking for drama-free fun. 

As for quid pro quo: If you really want to know my real name and we have trust, or we shoot a video together, I’ll tell you — seems only fair to me…

On The Gender Disparity Of Face Pictures And Living The Lifestyle In General

Originally posted on fetlife.com:

While both married and President of the United States, the self-proclaimed “leader of the free world” can stick cigars in his intern’s vagina and blow cum all over her — the most powerful man in the world using an underpaid intern, hardly a relationship of business or societal equals — without nary a consequence. Heck, millions of people thought it was cool. Possibly billions. He kept his job, without loss of pay, and now is a highly respected (and compensated) corporate speaker.

Conversely, a former stripper can’t sit on city council in supposedly enlightened Santa Cruz, Northern California. Nor can a one-movie “porn star” teach high school in the same state. Both were young, single women earning a legal living. Many professional men see escorts and no one really cares — possibly their wives, although many women are more supportive than generally thought.

Conversely, female professionals that escort would be ostracized and fired on their morality clause.

Meaning, the consequences of being sex-positive are several orders of magnitude disparate between the sexes. Entry into the wink-wink, nudge-nudge “good ‘ole boys'” club for one gender; income loss, societal scorn and lifelong spurning for the other gender.

So, no face pictures. Or other definitively identifying photographs. Not emailed, not taken if we meet, never. Don’t ask.


A Programmer’s Term: Read The Fucking Manual

Location: DTC, Colorado.
Availability: By Appointment For Verified Clients Only

  1. I communicate for scheduling purposes only: Please do the same. I just don’t have time to chat with everyone (or anyone, really) that contacts me.
  2. Verification: Required. If you think it’s reasonable that single women should meet anonymous men in her home, we’re just not a match. I do verify the real names of all clients, and for that I prefer LinkedIN. If you have a profile there, send me a “connect” and a day/time you’d like to meet. I verify real names in person, bring your license..
  3. Do not send me acronyms.  Literacy, chivalry and first impressions count! Address me in a legible manner using complete sentences so I understand what you mean. By following my requests in (1, 2) above, it indicates that you respect my safety and feel that my rules do apply to you. If I sense you are a person who believes the covenants of society do not apply to them, I won’t see you.
  4. When your time is up, leave on time. If your issues make you unable to be ready to leave on time, compensate me for your difficulties. One hundred roses per 20 minutes. If  you overstay long enough I miss my next appointment, pay for that appointment, with tip so I can offer a gift to the person who didn’t get to come.
  5. Never ask or hint at wanting dates/uncompensated time: I dislike people who put me in the position where I have to say no.
  6. Never ask me personal or explicit questions: I’ll block you. If you have requests, make them politely in the opening shower, obviously in person.
  7. Compensation: Is only for CO Title 12, section 12, paragraph 35.5-110 “legal alternative methods that employ contact structured to deepen a person’s awareness of movement patterns in his or her body.” Leave the fee on the table by the door upon initial arrival.
  8. Treat me as well as I treat you. Seems pretty obvious. While I have thick skin from this business, I’m not a fan of hearing statements such as “if you lost 30 pounds I’d see you every week”
  9. Mutual respect of time is required: Don’t waste it with inane messages. Don’t play fake-name games with me. If we schedule a meeting, arrive five minutes early — if you are available earlier, let me know and wait in your car for an invite in. Unless pre-arranged or an act of nature intercedes, arriving late is your loss, see #4 above.
  10. Turn your phone off or leave it in your car. I catch people trying to record, take pictures or outright film me every week. It’s irritating. I have always politely asked clients to cease, but reserve the right to tell you to leave.
  11. The polite suggestion to shower together at the beginning of our time isn’t really a suggestion.
  12. Have the self security to show up, turn your brain off and let me take care of you. It’s the point of seeing me. Never ask to “meet for coffee or a drink” to have me expend my free time to show up to verify you in person — insecure men are historically troublesome, asking me to spend uncompensated time for you to decide if you want to verify and/or see me is a huge “red flag”. If you feel you’re that special, pay for a half hour session in advance (which can be done anonymously) then ask me to meet somewhere near my incall.
  13. Trying to negotiate with me: Haggling is ugly, there’s a fee for trying.
  14. Cancellations: I’m well known for being pretty mellow about this. Be communicative, be honest. Stuff happens, it’s no big deal. That said, if you are playing games or flake at the last minute, the fee is due in full before I’ll agree to see you again.
  15. INDICATE YOU UNDERSTAND THIS IS LEGAL, AND I SPECIFICALLY OFFER NO ILLEGAL SERVICES: I’m specifically offering no illegal services: This is CO Title 12, section 12-35.5-110 legal alternative methods that employ contact structured to deepen a person’s awareness of movement patterns in his or her body. This is fee-based “legal alternative contact”, and compensated accordingly.
  16. Law Enforcement Officers: See #15 above: This is legal and you are welcome to visit, but not if you’re lying about your employment. If you lie about being law enforcement for any reason, you agree that you’ve approached me with unclean hands. Knowing I offer only legal services under 12-35.5-110, if you willfully and unreasonably commit the crime of solicitation and/or use any explicit language after agreeing not to (2,6, above) you expressly agree that all your actions are unclean, both now and in the future, and you waive governmental and qualified immunity for your crimes.